There are some days when I am truly embarrassed to call myself a mother. I'm no good at tough love and cave very easily. My kids are now 14 and 16 and I have failed as a parent and of course now it is too late. So please come and join my crap-parent-aholics group if you find yourself doing any of the following.
There are days when I am shouty mum for absolutely no other reason that I am. I hate myself for it and I act in a wholly unreasonable way and either hope it gets out of my system or that I don't do anything stupid. I am inconsistent - see above. This morning shouty, this afternoon loving, who knows what the evening will bring? I have been drunk in front my kids more times than I care to mention. Well more tipsy than drunk but definitely under influence. Most recently on Christmas day when I tried to fix my sisters curtain track whilst balancing in high heels on the back of a sofa before I went flying backwards through the air. I don't spend enough time with my son. Or this could be my daughter. Mainly my son though. It's hard trying to fit one on one time when neither of us like each other much and one of spends most of their time in bed. I have spent so much of my life putting them first that's its been bordering on the unhealthy, particularly since the departure of Mr Ex. Now it's my turn it's a bit of a shock to the system. I can't be arsed with asking/nagging them to do jobs round the house. It's all the arguments that follows. Maybe its just their age but they never do things in the time frame that you want it doing in. If the dog is walked, the dishes cleaned and put away and the ironing mountain under control then I'm happy. G-man ( Grandad ) thinks otherwise and regularly has a go. This turns me into shouty mum. see point 1 I feel like I've let them grow up too quickly and my daughter seems to have gone from 11 to 20 in a very short space of time. She's 14 and is all knowing and far too wise for her age. She looks after me. I think its supposed to be the other way round. I have to make a real effort to sit out and do nothing with them ie watch tv during the day. It seems such a waste. I watch Misfits/The Inbetweeners and Skins with them. Cringing behind cushions all the time. She-ra is made to sit behind the cushions too when anything rude comes on the screen so all she hears is the sound effects. Maybe thats worse? She probably watches on demand anyway and just humours me, especially when i give the accompanying commentary about S E X. These are not family viewing programmes. I struggle to keep a track of school life. Letters rarely make it home and I find homework difficult to understand. Why can't they teach old school like? *wails
If you feel that you share any of these traits then maybe we should form an official society or something. You could get a certificate in the post and be invited for Gin & Tonic evenings on a school night.