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Friday, 28 January 2011

2 buttons, a haircut and a blow job


This week it was my birthday. I don't do birthdays very well or maybe that should be bad things happen to me on my birthday.This can be anything minor bordering on the trivial eg bad hair day to major such as the black dog of despair pawing at your door. Either way something awful always happens on them so I have learnt to very low expectations. On the shopping for gifts front January is such a shite month, particularly by the time you get to the end of the month where the shops have come to the end of their sales and even Harvey Nichols as an aura of village hall jumble sale about it. The new season stock is coming in dribs and drabs and lets face it who wants to buy silky chiffon wisps of fabric when you have more layers on than a mille feuille. Going into the changing room when it takes you half an hour to take off what you already have on means that garment must be bloody worth it. And No, Mrs Shop Assistant, I haven't' even got the sodding jeans on yet.

A celebratory evening meal is always welcomed. Last year VGF@Work cooked a lovely Mexican meal for us all which was tarred only by the fact we were late due to He-man being mugged earlier that day and police interviews taken place. Some years a takeaway was all we could muster. This time I was treated to steak frites in little French bistro - yum, big fat glass of red wine double yum. She-ra baked one of her fab cakes - triple yum.

Giftwise my family and friends do me proud. Ex husband was terrible. In fact without wanting to sound ungrateful he was fecking terrible. I think the jar of glacé cherries and cd ( that he liked ) will never leave my memory. So it was with ghosts of partners past that I worried. OK only worried slightly-what would Hot Date would bring to the table? She-ra was on text message central offering tips etc from my scribbly list posted on the kitchen notice board in the vain hope that someone would indeed notice it. And noticed it was. I feel truly spoilt. I thinks someone must have been looking at a recent blog . All Jo Maloned up. Brownie points - Him - bucket loads. He's set the standard now which I will have to return

The title of this blog refers to what I actually did on the big day. Bought two shiny buttons for the jacket that seems to spends its life wishing them to jump off kamikaze style when I'm least expecting it. The hair cut was most needed and lovely to have. And the blow job? Hey you need a lot puff to blow as many candles as I have on my cake.




8 comments:

  1. Happy Birthday to you and a big welcome to all those people who will be reading this in weeks to come having googled "big fat blow job with glace cherries".

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  2. Yup - that did catch my attention! Happy belated birthday anyway! Mine is in early Feb, but I love it then, as it is the one nice thing in that hideous, cold and gloomy month to look forward to and then to bask in the warmth of kindness shown towards me for the rest of the month. Then it's March and the shoots are beginning to show....ah!

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  3. Trish- thank you. You wouldn't believe some of the key words that peoplehave typed to find me. I think wet gusset is the most popular.

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  4. Diney - Feb is a much better month with Spring just around the corner. I like a well turned headline, I should have written for The Sun

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  5. yes, you will now have a sinister following of lurkers who were indeed googling 'blow job' and found you Trish is right! Many happy returns - so pleased you have some decent pressies and feel loved and wanted and you didn't even mention feeling old, so it must have been a really good birthday. Betty x

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  6. Belated happy birthday! hope you made a wish when you blew.......

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  7. Betty - what's another year? No point in counting anymore

    Libby - I have terrible memory must be old age setting in as can't remember what I wished for

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  8. Hope your birthday was great. Much love from your auntie xxxx

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