I would not recommend that any one follows what I do. I certainly would not want to be held accountable. Newly divorced, having been married for over 20 years, it has been a long time since I have played the courtship game. It;s scary. So how do you get that person to go for coffee etc. Ask - it worked for me. Then hopefully that is a reciprocated in the form of a drink? That worked too. There should be no problem with asking after all if you want something you should ask for it. Those first few conversations are hard though. What do you talk about? Finding common ground helps but nothing too controversial. Clearly the advent of email and texts make things a bit easier and flirting great fun compared to the technology available in my youth, not quite tin can and wire but not far off. All the while establishing whether there is a frisson of passion. In this case - yes.
But how do you read the signs? I would have better luck with tea leaves as I am never aware when someone is hitting on me. How do you know that the other person is interested? Are their pupils dilated? one friend asked - As I couldn't' even maintain eye contact for very long I couldn't establish that until 4th rendezvous. It was here that I finally managed to be myself and I found that a good sense of humour and good line of put downs can be a good aphrodisiac. Having established that there is definitely attraction you need to get a dinner or drinks date sorted. The flow of alcohol loosens up the old inhibitions and before you know it you are talking away. " Don't worry " another friend said " you'll find plenty to talk about ." However don't talk about the subjects I did. Sex, lack of, gagging for it, finding the other person very attractive and referring to your self as Miss Moist ( see sense of humour ) in text messages unless of course you intend to do something about it. With all this direct inference to sex you would expect that once alone with a bedroom not far away ( actually who cares about the bedroom a closed door will do ) that passion would ensue at rate of knots. It was here that I was introduced to the St Petersburg Technique. Not something I had come across before and not a bizarre sexual position although I am sure that I could conjure one up. With glass of wine in hand, heart beating with anticipation it was with wonderment that I found myself watching a tourist information film on the wonders of St Petersburg. Half expecting a Russian plumber to come knocking at the winter palace door only to find the attendants half naked ready willing and able I instead found myself watching a virtual tour of the city in the summer. Clearly the dampening of ardour was moderate and I have congratulated OTE on his unusual technique wondering if there is a second installment of series.