Warning! If you don't like bodily fluids look away now.
There is a lump. Near my armpit area. It has been checked out and it's a "nothing to be worried about" lump. Can someone tell this to Lump please. It has been there quite happily minding its own business for the past year or so til recently. Something's made it angry. And you know what happens when you get angry ? Yes that's right you go green! Or in this case red and swollen. Think "how to get ahead in advertising" So when Lump wakes me in the middle of night because it's feeling very angry I try to placate it with Very Hot Water Salt Solution. It's getting very big and may explode at any moment. Take cover. You have been warned!
As I chowed down on my cob of corn, chin dripping with melted butter I was reminded of this recent article in Sunday Times by Mrs Mills. I bring it to you now for those lovers of a double entendre......
A reader had enquired to Mrs Mills how to tell the ripeness of sweet corn as their wife insisted you could tell by gently feeling the swollen cob. Whereas the husband felt a firm grasp and a peel back from tip was a better guide. There was also a query that ripeness could be guaged by crushing the seed to see if it produced a milky fluid. Mrs Mills, that sage oh so wise, settled the debate by claiming they were both right! A translucent milky fluid should indeed come out if pressed hard; the cob is overripe if thick and white. If you have pulled back the husk to soon an elastic band round the husk will keep it going til it's, er, ready.
I decided to see what others in the know suggested.
Jane Grigson offers further advice on how to prepare said cob by standing it upright, held at a slight angle and to scrape done as hard as you can. You should continue to do this more vigorously to get the last bits ( kernels I believe) and juice. Apparently it can be done quite rapidly too.
The BBC Gardening guide tells you that the corn is pollinated by the make flowers shedding onto the females tassels.Ripeness is indeed down to milky juice.